LIVE! FROM THE ULTRADOME! THE BIGGEST SPECTACLE IN ANIME AND VIDEO GAME SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT AND IMPROFANFIC! IT'S TIME FOR... { M A G I C A L C R O S S O V E R } { F I G H T I N G F E D E R A T I O N } { .-----------. } { | U-L-T-R-A | } { `-----------' } { http://www.pixelscapes.com/improfanfic } Chapter 12: Paid Vacation? Author: Stefan Gagne NOTE : This week's scheduled author, Chris Brown, due to real life obligations, was unable to complete suggested rewrites on his episode of Ultra. He suggested I have the episode rewritten instead, as there just wasn't enough time to rework it. I'd like to apologize, the situation was pretty messy, and it ended up as a snafu. Gomen nasai! What follows is basically just some character/plot advancing miniscenes, no actual fights. I figured having something out there would be better than no Ultra for 16 days. I promise not to write anything else for Ultra except for my upcoming omake, 'Ultra vs. WWF', until UltraRage Beta. ^_^; Thanks to T-kun for the Kasumi scene idea near the end. -=- It had been one hell of a show. Or, to be more precise, a rather heavenly show. But now it was over, and it was time to go back to the earthbound UltraDome, and get on with the next show. Kasumi was pleased with herself. Mostly. Things went according to plan. Jack's attempts to cheat and foil the other fighters were foiled once again, Ash learned a valuable lesson, Gally found something else to fight for, and so on and so forth... but there was still a nagging feeling of something she had missed. An oversight. Her omniscience had limits that she never fully understood (that non-understanding being another limit in itself), and that led to a lot of worry... Not worry over the trip back home. No, she had taken care to separate out the various teams, partners and rivals into separate buses (transdimensional ones) so that there would be no problems. Not worry over Tokyo, which the This Old Dojo repair crew had almost finished. Something else... "Something troubling you?" Kaworu asked, from the seat across from her. "Perhaps," Kasumi said. "Is it Xelloss?" Kaworu wondered. "I haven't seen him since the show ended, and we know he still has a penchant for mischief and isn't quite solidified into the fold yet--" "No, no. Xelloss doesn't worry me..." Kasumi said. Pausing. Reflecting. "I still remember a time when my biggest worry of the day would be if I could iron father's clothes well enough to keep them toasty warm, the way he likes it. Perhaps it's just the Adjustment." "Perhaps." The bus rocked with a silent blast of white light, as it pulled out of Heaven and onto Earth's soils. It rolled down a Tokyo street... fully repaired, and not looking a thing like it had just been annihilated in the Apocalypse Brawl. Even Tokyo Tower was back up. Kasumi smiled. That had gone well. The drive continued, to the outskirts of Tokyo, to the UltraDome. To where the UltraDome used to stand. "Oh my," Kasumi stated. "That must be what it is." * Ranma stepped off the bus, his travel duffel bag slung over one shoulder, walking towards the flaming wreckage. He wasn't real happy with the way things were going lately... he lost to Sakura. That was okay; it was a.. relatively clean loss, and against a worthy opponent. Then she lost to Dan. And the thought of HIS.. of the title being in Dan's hands just made him foam-- Flaming wreckage? "Holy cow, what happened?!" he blurted, dropping his bag. The UltraDome... well, matter can neither be created nor destroyed, so it wasn't missing. But it had been beaten into a shape that was almost totally unrecognizable, if not for being circular and of the same dimensions. Twisted red hot metal jutted out from the huge crater, strewn with seats from the arena, with props, with debris. It was like some gigantic force of nature came down and stomped the whole thing flat. The ULTRA logo, the rainbow hued neon light, piffled out and sparkled and died as Ranma watched. "Aiya! UltraDome go boom!" Shampoo declared, walking out of her own bus. "This very bad, yes?" Mousse adjusted his glasses. "I don't see anything the matter..." Slowly, all the fighters mulled around, concerned. Nobody attacked each other despite vicious enemies being in close quarters. This is a common phenomenon at the site of any major disaster; folks like to rubberneck and ask each other what's going on instead of actually worrying about their own lives. Kasumi's bus pulled to the forefront, and she stepped out.. Kaworu handing her a megaphone, so she could address the group. "...it seems that someone or something has destroyed the arena," she said. "At the moment, we don't know who... and the This Old Dojo crew is too tired from fixing Tokyo to begin work immediately. So, this week's episode will have to be canceled, and we'll resume the show next week. Go home, take a rest and train, or simply enjoy the vacation. Thank you!" "Home?" Ranma asked, visions of Akane flashing through his head. Akane, who he hadn't thought much about, or called on the phone, or even written a letter to in weeks. While he was staying under that roof with Shampoo somewhere nearby... He grabbed his duffel, looked for the closest mountain, and ran for it so he could train for the week instead. * The fighters went home. It wasn't something they were accustomed to, as they had dormitories in the UltraDome. For the large part, not much happened. Rest. Peace. Tranquility. More or less. * At Controversial Jack's Secret Headquarters of Chaos And Chuck E Cheese's Pizza and Video Game Supply Storage Room, Sex and Violence Had To Undergo... sorry. Had to undergo a rite of passing. "You guys suck! All of you!" Jack declared, to his captive audience; he'd taken the liberty to chloroform the whole lot of them and tie them to chairs so he could have their undivided attention. (Morrigan and Lillith could have busted out, but they were rather aroused by it and chose to play along.) "It's not our fault!" James of Team Rocket, the newest recruits, whined. "We beat him with Mew, but we didn't count on him having assistance--" "Exactly! You didn't tell me he had a friend with one of those.. those things! I don't believe this. Johnny, you're so busy stroking your ego that you aren't winning anything, you pathetic jobber! And Sofia... good lord, woman, I gave you the keys to the castle and not only do you lose my Hardcore title, but you are STILL the Biggest Loser in Ultra!" "I'll defeat Sakura! I swear!" Sofia pleaded. "That little witch won't stop me a... third? Second? How many times has it been? I forgot..." "Excuse me, what did we do, exactly?" Morrigan asked, squirming around in her bondage. "Oh, nothing. I just felt that you'd enjoy this." "See, sis? We picked just the right manager!" Lillith chirped. "He knows us so well!" "NEVERTHELESS!" Jack declared. "Sex and Violence needs to reclaim the honor of guiding Ultra towards chaotic violence and crazed hijinks. Especially with that freak Bison showing up and Stone Cold Dan Hibiki tossing off my seed of unpleasant intent. Kasumi won't run a namby-pamby little nice-nice clean show with us around! Bison won't turn it into a feast of a-typical dark evil power! The Orochi.... well, no, he's actually more like us lately. BUT STILL! We are going to train ALL WEEK in the Art of Controversy, and come back with a bang! But first you must all be punished for past failures." He rolled the TV/VCR usually used for showing Teletubbies tapes to the kids outside up in front of the group. He withdrew a black videocasette case from his shirt pocket. And put in the tape. "Now, witness the horror of watching THE ENTIRE SEASON OF DUBBED SAILOR MOON OVER AND OVER AGAIN!" Participants in Little Billy's birthday party out in the front room ran away shortly after, spooked off by all the screams of pain. * Stately Kunou Manor was silent. Dead silent. Tatewaki Kunou, samurai otaku, class president and all around suave guy, sat motionless in the center of his dojo. He sat, his kendo training sword across his lap. Eyes closed. Around him, on thirty nine pedestals of varying heights, were thirty nine watermelons. He breathed in. He breathed out. And... "HYAH!" Thirty four seconds later, seventy eight halves of watermelon were hanging in midair. And two seconds after that, one hundred and fifty six quarter-melons were on the ground. Kunou stopped lock solid, having finished his frenzy attack. Cursing himself. He'd have to make it faster than that if he was going to succeed. Never again would he be treated like.. like Johnny Cage was, frankly. He WOULD defeat Saotome. He WOULD claim the Gamma title from that idiot Dan Hibiki. But watermelons would not be enough. He required more intense training to match the zanshin of the ancient samurai. (And he also required a lot of other things, like training himself not to show off for the ladies, and not to think about his ego while fighting, and not to issue dramatic speeches. Which is why Kunou was always damn impressive in training, but had some problems when fighting someone in public...) He pondered his situation for a bit.. then his eyes snapped to focus, as a blur whisked through the room, dividing the quarter melons into one-eighth melons, and making the mathematics of this scene even more of a headache. "ENLIGHTENMENT!!!!" The warrior halted before Kunou, his reverse bladed sword drawn. "You violate my sanctuary?" Kunou asked, in a cold voice. "I, HAOHMARU, AM UNABLE TO OBEY THE MANDATE OF THE HEAVENS TO GO HOME AS MY HOME EXISTS SEVERAL HUNDRED YEARS IN THE PAST, AND THEREFORE I TRAVEL TOKYO SEEKING WORTHY CHALLENGES ON THE PATH OF THE WAY OF THE SWORD!" Kunou studied him. "...you were at UltraRage. I've seen you in my history books. The slayer of the monstrous Amakusa Shiro. The Legendary Haohmaru." "PERHAPS, ONE DAY YOU TWO SHALL ACHIEVE (OR RATHER COME VERY CLOSE TO AS ACTUALLY GETTING THERE IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR ANYBODY OTHER THAN ME) LEGENDARY STATUS AS WELL, YOUNG ONE! FOR NOW, WE FIGHT, AND YOUR PATH OF THE SWORD SHALL BE GUIDED BY THE RIGHTEOUS FURY OF--" "I accept," Kunou said, assuming a kendo stance. This would be very good training. Very good indeed. * Elsewhere, more training was taking place. Except instead of a proper dojo, it was in a suburban backyard. While folks enjoyed light refreshments in a suburban kitchen. "More cookies, Mr. Masters?" Sakura's mother asked. "Why, thank you!" Ken said, grabbing twelve. Sakura was all bubbles and glee. "This is so cool! You guys are training at my house! Of course, it's because the dojo we had set up got turned into matchsticks, but it's still cool. Hey, Ken, do you want to see my Backstreet Boys poster collection?" "Uhhh..." Ken said. Looking left and right for some kind of justifiable distraction. "Ryu! Hey! Spar with me!" "I can't," Ryu shouted, from the backyard. "Busy. Sorry. ...no, you have to follow through with your elbow." Ash Ketchum looked at his elbow in confusion. "But last time I did that, you said I messed up!" "Only because you have to STOP the momentum of your elbow before you snap it back," Ryu said. "It focuses the force of the blow..." "This isn't going to work," Ash grumbled, having a seat on the back porch. "I appreciate it, Mr.... what's your last name?" "...I'm not sure." "I appreciate it, Mr. Ryu, but I'm just not a fighter. I'm a Pokemon Trainer. I mean, Pikachu's always done the fighting... although I think he's getting kind of mad at me lately. I haven't seen him since we left heaven." Ryu sat down next to the boy. "It's not easy to train to be a fighter of any kind. Even basic self defense is going to take some time, Ash. I mean, I've been doing this for years, and I still don't think I've tapped my true potential..." "Years?!" Ash gaped. "I don't have years. Pikachu and I aren't doing real well in Ultra. I mean... we could be doing better..." He picked up a small stone, hurled it with his right arm, and skipped it twice across a small puddle before it punched right through Sakura's fence and spooked the neighbor's dog. "I don't think I can take that kind of time to--" Ryu stood up. "How did you..." "Huh?" "That throw! You've got great strength in that throw. How did you do that?" Ash shrugged. "That's the arm I throw my Pokeballs with. I'm good at doing that, at least. Why?" And.. Ryu smiled. "Well, balls are blunt objects, yes? Which are perfectly legal in a fight. And with that kind of a throwing arm..." * Far from there, muted music played in an otherwise silent room. A young boy bobbed his head in time to the music over his favorite walkman, while paging through the Playboy issue with Sable in it. The door to his room slid open. He didn't notice. Not until Asuka had started to garrote him with his own headphone cord. "SHINJI NO BAKA!" she shouted. "You were supposed to be topside for sync tests today! Rei and I had to cover for you!" "GHGHk!" Shinji gurgled, before scrabbling away from Asuka. "...so what? Who cares about Eva anymore? It's not like the angels are still attacking." Asuka stomped her foot. "That doesn't matter! We still have to be alert and ready. Third Impact can still happen!" "I don't care," Shinji said, grinning stupidly. "I really don't care about any of that anymore. I don't care about piloting Eva or--" "FINE!" Asuka declared. "You're no use in an Eva unit anymore, not since you 'changed'. Go and be a pornographer or a farmer or whatever! I'll take over your duties." "Duties? What duties?" "Simple!" Asuka grinned. "I'M going to enter the Omega division at Ultra with my shiny and perfect EVA-02! And then everybody will see what a real champion is like! And it's not like you, you.. recently weirded out weirdo who does weird things and I can't believe I kissed you!" "But you never win any fights," Shinji stupidly said. "You just get beat up by the angels until Rei or I save your sorry ass." He found himself kissing the floor immediately after that. The door slid shut, and he could hear Asuka's angry stomp fade away. Shinji rubbed his sore cheek. Why was she so angry? She was hot for his bod before!.... and what did she mean, no use ever since he 'changed'? It was a change for the better! Old Shinji was so lame!... And New Shinji hadn't really been much of a smash hit on the 'winning friends and influencing people' front either. Other than his dad, who he enjoyed chugging beers and talking about chicks with. (Notably Rei.) How much of an improvement was THAT? Once again unsure of his life and where it was going, he sat at his desk. Closed the Playboy, uninterested. And brooded. * The Tendo household was quiet. It had been rather quiet ever since Ranma moved out to the UltraDome, other than Akane's screaming from the Dojo as she broke various objects in her usual fits of anger. And this was normal. Nabiki relaxed, enjoying having some time off from the show -- it was one heck of an afterschool job, she had to admit, and it took a lot of time. She idly checked her stocks over the Internet and her off-track betting systems. And this was normal as well. Soun Tendo played go with a panda, and this was normal despite the surreality of it. Kasumi was busy cooking in the kitchen, and this was not normal. But for her, it felt like the most natural thing in the world. She had a big dinner planned for father, all his favorite dishes. She'd been working for hours on it. Cooking was one of the joys she had in life.. although cooking for herself was never that much fun. Cooking for her family, now, that was delightful. "...you know, sis..." "Hai, Akane-chan?" Kasumi asked, looking over from her steaming vegetables. Akane had just gotten back from a workout, and was leaning in the kitchen doorway. "You don't have to do that, I mean.. Nabiki usually orders sushi delivery, since she got rich through her job," Akane said. "And you're, you know--" "I know. But I enjoy this," Kasumi said. "I had been hoping work would ease up long enough for me to have a nice, quiet family dinner." Akane grumbled. "If only RANMA was around for it." "Oh, he didn't come home? I can fix that." And with a wave of her soup stirring spoon, Ranma appeared in the middle of the room, in mid-kata pose. Blinking a few times. "RAAANMA!" Akane yelled. "Where were you!?" Yes, this is it, Kasumi thought to herself, smiling. Just a nice, quiet family dinner. Like they always had. * Elsewhere, things were quiet as well. But deathly quiet. In one of the largest underground bunkers in existence, a man in uniform studied his latest creation. It had proven very, very effective in the simple test he set out for it; destroy the UltraDome. Show those simple ENTERTAINERS what true power was. "I'm impressed," Bison admitted. "Your reconstruction has proven to be even more powerful than before. With a built in Psycho Drive and a mix of Apocalypse's technology, you truly have become the deadliest force in existence. Now... to business--" A red eye glowed in the darkness. "I said before, I do not work for you," the demon's digital voicebox rumbled. His mechanical arms flexing. Much more machine than man, in this form, other than some of the flesh in the head... Lord Bison simply smiled his trademark grin of evil doom. "Actually, you do work for me. I've installed a controlling processor in you similar to the one I placed in Ifurita. You are mine, CyberAkuma. And with you.. I will take Ryu, and complete all my various plans." CyberAkuma, not willing to accept this, broke Bison's neck. But it didn't work. In fact, Akuma hadn't moved an inch. His body refused, as the body was owned lock stock and barrel by the Psycho Drive... "For now, it's time for you to train. Spar with my lovely doll, and prove your might," Bison said.. snapping his fingers, and summoning Ifurita. The young woman floated in place, prone, eyes glazed with no free will. Looking at her target passively. The Power Key Staff was raised. Akuma cursed this bastard who thought he could control HIM, could control the Evil Intent. He flexed a metal fist. He would play along... for now. Just long enough. -=- ][ ULTRA EPISODE 12 RESULTS RECAP: ][ Show canceled due to UltraDome demolition. ][ ASUKA LANGLEY / EVA-02 entered OMEGA division. ][ Next scheduled author : Vidstudent