[Ed. Note - Like last time, we had a skip, and this is a filler episode. There was a major new development planned for this one which it was impossible to skip over, so a quickie ep has been built around it.] The smell of money was thick in the air today. Controversial Jack walked along the halls of his beloved Ultradome, home of fun, mirth, mayhem, and maimings, clipboard in hand and whistling a Pixies cover of Devo's rendition of Nine Inch Nails's 'Head Like a Hole' with an Irish jig twist. It was the PERFECT card. Ten matches of amazing drama! High impact fighting action! Rivals up against each other in crazed gimmick matches! And, topping it all off, Ranma vs. Shingo, sure to be a ratings dream. It was ideal. It was perfect. His credit card debt would poof into thin air, just like that, and Ultra wouldn't be in danger of losing its #1 slot among males 18-34. Strange, though, how the dome was so quiet. There was the cheering of the fans outside, seated and ready for action, but no fighters talking / arguing / brawling backstage... He walked along past the cafeteria, peeking in to see who was around.. and saw nobody. He checked the men's room. He checked the ladies' room. He checked the ladies' room twice, just for fun. But nobody was around... He caught his secretary skipping off towards the exit, and flagged her down. "Nuku! What's going on?" Jack asked. "Are the trains running late or something? Where is everybody? We've got a show in ten minutes here!" "Ano?" Nuku-Nuku asked. "Oh! A whole bunch of people came up to the office asking to take off tonight. They all seemed very excited about something called the 'Playstation 2' being released today, and I thought it'd be nice, so I let them go." Jack's shiny happy joy shattered like a shattering thing. "WHAT?! You let them leave before a show!?" "Well, you DID give me that rubber stamp with your signature on it so I could take care of those boring requisition forms," Nuku said. "And since I know you're a really great wonderful boss, I thought it'd be a great thing to do! Ne, Jack-san?" "You... YOOOOOUUU...." he growled, looming over Nuku.... before groaning, and reverting to ordinary controversy levels. "Dammit. I can't get properly pissed off at an adorable robotic catgirl with a looser grasp on reality than I have. Okay. Okay. So... my entire show is ruined. TELL me at least Ranma and Shingo are here!" "I think they're training, Jack-san." "Right. Okay. So. We have one match..." Jack mused, crossing off nine lines on his clipboard with much pain and suffering. "I made a promise to Voiduck, so that one's going on whether his opponent is here or not. The little fowl bastard may be a wuss now, but without my Super Contrajin powers I'd rather not get the squirt mad... but if everybody else is gone..." If everybody else was gone, he was sunk. He needed some VERY high profile matches to justify tonight's limited episode. Without them, he might as well signal surrender to the monster truck show on the other channel and get his legs broken by the fine people at Mastercard... What he needed, technically, was a miracle. "Nuku, get on your knees and make like you're praying," Jack said, doing similar. "Ahem. O great Lina, who art in heaven, I know I technically wanted your job last season and you probably hate my guts, but have pity on this poor booker and--" "Okay, okay, jeez, get up already," Lina said, who had appeared five seconds previously thanks to wonderful powers over time and space. "Don't worry. I was going to ask you for a favor today anyway. And this way, I don't have to smite you into agreeing! I need a special match booked." Jack perked an eyebrow. "...is it..." He raised a pinky to his lips. "Controversial?" "You bet," Lina said, with a sly grin. "It's time I do a little something about this Gourry situation, once and for all. I need..." She whispered it over, and some of Jack's shining joyful hope was restored. He jotted down the notes... three matches would have to do. But WHAT a triad of matches! Add a little new twist to the main event, aaaaand... he tore the booking card off the clipboard, and passed it to Nuku. "Nuku-chan, take this out to the boys," he commanded. "It's time to make the doughnuts." * LIVE! FROM THE ULTRADOME! THE BIGGEST SPECTACLE IN ANIME AND VIDEO GAME SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT AND IMPROFANFIC! IT'S TIME FOR... { M A G I C A L T R O U B L E S H O O T I N G } { C R O S S O V E R F I G H T I N G } { F E D E R A T I O N } { .-----------. } { | U-L-T-R-A | } { `-----------' } { http://www.improfanfic.com } Episode #37: ImproBooking in Action! Episode written by Twoflower and W4 * The audience was loud. What more needs to be said? Oh, alright, if you insist... The very volume level of the audience rivaled that of sixteen Concordes taking off from JFK airport for a nonstop cross-Atlantic flight, while the intensity of their excitement was pumping sixteen cubic acres of pure adrenaline in cumulative total through the collective body of everybody present and they were DAMN LOUD. "Are you ready for a war?!" Hiroshi announced, pumping up the crowd beyond safe levels. "Are you ready for a clash of the titans? Are you ready for the most exciting episode of Ultra EVER, with ten full matches of crazed fighting action!? ARE YOU READY!?" "NO!" the crowd shouted. "GIVE US FIVE MORE MINUTES!" "..." Hiroshi replied. Daisuke put a hand over his mike, flipping the OFF switch. "Hiro... trouble. You know that amazing ten fight card? It's gone. Nuku just passed me the new one... and we've got three fights on it. Get ready for a riot, the audience isn't gonna like this..." "Yow!" Hiroshi exclaimed. "No, that's not good... hmm. Observe, Daisuke, and watch the master at work. Turn the mike back on." "Whatever, it's your funeral," Daisuke decided, flicking it back to ON. "NEWS FLASH!!" Hiroshi shouted. "We've got an emergency redesign of tonight's show... and we're about to see THREE amazing clashes! Tonight, we see fan favorite Godhead Taunting Legend Stone Cold Dan Hibiki taking on Voiduck, master of the adorable apocalypse! How long has it been since we've seen Dan in action? ARE YOU READY FOR DAN, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!?" "SURE THING!" the crowd shouted back. "Then, and I KNOW you'll like this... we've got a special Omega grudge match! Our Omega champion, strongest of all the strongest and proven in battle, Naga the White Serpent... takes on the Adversary, the Father of Lies, the Recently Appointed Prince of Darkness... CLOUD STRIFE! Cloud's not a regular fighter, but by heaven's mandate, we WILL see these two get it on!" "WOW! THAT WILL BE A VERY INTERESTING MATCH!" the crowd screamed in unison. "And lastly... as promised, we sign, seal, and deliver! No DQ! No holds barred! And recently added by chief executive of Ultra, Controversial Jack... Ranma vs. Shingo for the Gamma Belt will be an 'I Quit' match! The fight goes on until one submits in defeat!! This could be the most brutal, painful experience you'll ever SEE here in Ultra! NOW! ARE YOU READY?!" "PRETTY MUCH, YES!" "Let's go LIVE AND DIRECT to the scene of our first Omega match, and let's get READY TO RUMBLE!" Hiroshi shouted, turning red in the face from all the screaming. He waited until the camera light clicked to OFF AIR, and slumped back in his seat. "..." Daisuke said. "It's all in the excitement, you see," Hiroshi wheezed, trying to catch his breath. "Could you call medlab? I think I gave myself heart palpitations." * March 3, 2000. A day that would live in infamy. For it was the day that the Playstation 2 was released for sale in Japan. Thousands of years in the future, historians would agree that this date was the most important date of the second millenium. Unfortunately, that is proof that binge-drinking would still be popular then. But back to March 3, 2000... There was a traffic-stopping mob surrounding the toy store, "King Ricky Chicken." (Their motto: "A customer is you! All your money are belong to us!") People had begun to converge upon the shop since last week, eagerly awaiting their chance to be one of the first people on their block... no, the WORLD... to own a Playstation 2. What had started out as three or four people had grown into three or four thousand. Half of the people in the crowd were the (not-so-)loyal crew of the Magical Crossover Troubleshooting Fighting Federation Ultra. The person, who was in front of the mob... "Why won't the store open? I, the Legendary Taunting Godhead Dan Hibiki, have been waiting endlessly for my chance to play the director's cut version of 'Parappa the Rapper!' OYAJIIIIIII!" ...needed no introduction. It could be argued that he needed a good, swift kick to the head. Thanks to a slightly irritable (read: bitchy) Karin Kanzuki, that's what he got. Dan, in a demonstration of why millions of viewers and watchers cheered him week after week, turned to Karin, flexed his forearm and shouted, "OOSHA!" Karin was blown back several blocks. Dan scratched the back of his head, bigsweatted and chuckled. "Oopsie," he remarked. "Forgot about the godhead powers again." Resuming his defiant, "I-am-mighty" mindset, he continued, "But that was nothing compared to the time I tried using the restroom and accidentally..." "[VOI]!" The mob turned to a voice that came from inside "King Ricky Chicken." They saw Voiduck in front of a television screen. On the screen was Controversial Jack. "Hey nonny nonny, ninny!" Jack yelled to Dan. "So, instead of doing your job at Ultra, you're goofing off on company time. Do you have ANY idea how that makes me feel? Why don't you tell him, Mr. Duck?" Mr. Duck squeaked a few times. Controversial Jack gasped, "Such language! But he's right, Dan. You need to be punished." Dan flexed his forearm in front of the television screen. "DOSHTA DOSHTA!" he yelled. "You think to intimidate DAN?!? I... AM... MIGHTY!" The crowd erupted in cheers as if to agree with him. Meanwhile, Mr. Duck squeaked to Controversial Jack, who was getting an ear-to-ear grin on his face. "Oooh, that's a GREAT idea!" Controversial Jack cheered. "Hey, Dan! I got the perfect punishment for you! And the other ducky should LOVE this..." "[VOOOOOI]!" Voiduck muttered, glaring at Controversial Jack's image. Controversial Jack started typing at a keyboard frantically. "Since you want a piece of the Playstation 2 so badly, I'm going to give it to you! You and Voiduck are going to have an Omega Match in the Playstation 2 game, "Twisted Bandigods!" "[VOI]?!?" Voiduck shrieked. "Bring it on! For no matter who the opponent is, Legendary Taunt--" Before Dan could finish, both were sucked into the television screen as the mob watched, transfixed to the screen which read, "Twisted Bandigods: Ultra Debug Mode." ][ OMEGA MATCH ][ LEGENDARY TAUNTING GODHEAD DAN HIBIKI VS. VOIDUCK ][ FIGHT! "-ing Godhead Dan Hibiki will triumph!" Dan concluded. "OYAJIIIIMPH!" Dan's taunt was cut short when a bandicoot, three stories tall and wearing clown makeup on its face, threw an apple in Dan's legendary taunting mouth which lodged itself in his windpipe. "[DUCK]! [VOIVOI]!" Voiduck chirped as he looked at the Bandigod and bigsweatted. Meanwhile, Dan was trying to give himself the Heimlich Manuever. "The fool!" a random crowd member shouted. "Doesn't he know that he needs to press back, back-down, down, X, down-forward, forward, square, R2, G5 and FF:F to execute the Heimlich Manuever?" The Bandigod stomped towards Voiduck. "BLEARGH!" it shouted. Voiduck shot a wave of psychic force at the Bandigod. Dan shot the dislodged apple from his throat. The Bandigod shrugged off both attacks, but muttered something under its breath about how disgusting that apple looked. Both Ultra combatants opted to run like hell. Or, more specially, Dan opted to run like hell, while Voiduck waddled at a pretty fast clip. The Bandigod gave chase, shouting "BLEARGH!" Dan and Voiduck might have been able to outrun the Bandigod, but Voiduck realized two things. First, he realized that this was an Omega match, and defeating the crowd favorite, Dan, and sending him to the [VOID] would teach the Ultra-watching fools a lesson. Second, the Bandigod from which they were fleeing would make for the perfect executioner. Voiduck waddled in front of Dan, causing the cosmically-charged Shotokan warrior to trip and fall. Voiduck, pleased that Dan's last moments were imminent, continued to waddle to safety. Dan sat up and somersaulted backwards. He somersaulted onto the Bandigod's foot, up the Bandigod's leg, past the Bandigod's torso, up its arm and on finally stood up on top of its head. "OOSHA!" he hollered. "Dan stands triumphant!" "BLEARGH!" the Bandigod hollered. Dan looked down. He did not realize that he was standing on the Bandigod's head. But he DID realize a giant hand swiftly coming from the sky to turn him into a Dancake. So he used his godhead powers to somersault down the other side of the Bandigod's body to avoid the blow. He was back on the ground by the time the Bandigod slapped itself on the head. "BLEARGH!" it wailed in pain, rubbing its head. "[VOI]?!?" Voiduck hollered, looking back to find Dan very much alive. And then, Dan did something amazing. Granted, that "amazing" was the last term that anyone would use to describe the Gadouken, which was about as big and damaging as a ping- pong ball, but this time was a clear exception. Dan leapt up three stories, his jump peaking right next to the Bandigod's right ear. His battle aura erupted in a pink pillar, and he emitted a battle cry which would have made Conan wet his loincloth in fear. He then wound up as if to throw a Gadouken. He shouted, "DAN DAN ULTRA-MEGA-ALPHA-DEXY-WHOOPASS SHINKU GADOUKEN!" And roughly five-hundred high-speed (but still low-range) Gadoukens slammed into the Bandigod's hear, causing it to yell in pain and stagger forward. The crowd, watching, went wild. Their hollering and cheering for Dan could be heard as far as the shores of California. For the coup de grace, Dan screamed, "DAN DAN MIGHTY-OMEGA-FUNGI- CREAMY-GOLDEN BOOT TO DA HEAD!", giving the Bandigod one swift kick to the Bandigod's head. Its eyes becoming "X"s, the Bandigod fell forward. It fell towards a very panicked-looking Voiduck. "[VOI]!" it shouted, sending all the psychic force it had at the falling Bandigod. The television screen and its respective Playstation 2 unit exploded. A moment later, "King Ricky Chicken" was on fire. The crowd, realizing the severity of the situation, shouted out as one, "MY GOD! THE PLAYSTATION 2S ARE IN TROUBLE!!!" When the fire department arrived, they had to forcibly pry rabid fans from the burning store to combat the flames. But it was too little and too late. All that the firefighters could salvage from the burning store were a Shokotan warrior in a pink gi and a cross-looking purple duck. "HEY! That duck ruined the Playstation 2s!" one crowd member shouted. "...voi?" Voiduck asked as an angry mob encircled him. Normally, being surrounded by so much unmasked anger and hatred would have been a great boon to Voiduck. But when one is, for all intents and purposes, a Muppet-esque lifeform, and the anger and hatred is expressed in kicks, punches and blows from street signs and fire hoses, anger and hatred tend to be two very unwanted things. Dan walked away from the scene, never looking back. He was satisfied with himself. He felt the pride a warrior feels when overcoming overwhelming odds. If there was one thing that he had proved today, it was that he was, indeed, mighty. "HEY! Dan has a Playstation 2!" someone shouted. And there was also the fact that Dan had the only functioning Playstation 2 in a one-mile radius. "EEP!" he squeaked as he used his godhead powers to outrun the mob. * ...and Daisuke was rendered completely speechless. "Yet another... interesting fight involving Stone Cold Dan Hibiki, ladies and gentlemen!" Hiroshi announced. "We'll be right back after these messages." "I haven't been injecting any hard drugs lately, have I, Hiroshi?" "Not that I know of." "Oh. Good." * There is a fine art to trashing hotel rooms. It's been perfected over the decades gone by, honed into a professional skill by such masters as Ozzy Osbourne, Motley Crue, Pink Floyd, and Marlo Semaj. You can often recognize the signature destruction of a learned master within seconds of viewing the wreckage. When Nabiki entered his dressing room, to find that nothing had survived the young man's wrath, she knew immediately what had happened. It wasn't the first time he'd forcibly taken apart everything around him in some temper tantrum. "Those things cost money, you know," Nabiki said quietly. She did step just outside the door, however... lately, she'd been trusting Ranma's ability to pick his targets less and less. Ranma glared over at her. "I'm training. Go away." "Training?" Nabiki asked, peering around. "You call this training? ...what's with your eyes? They've got all these dark lines under them. How much sleep did you get last night?" He sat down on the remains of a chair, and rubbed his eyes. "I think... none. I haven't slept for a few days. I gotta stay focused. I gotta get ready..." "Ranma! I told you to stop DOING that! Arhgh... you're going to lose tonight," Nabiki declared. "You're in terrible shape. How on earth am I supposed to be the manager of a champion when you won't even listen to me? I came into this partnership with you for glory, marketing opportunities, and the belt... not to babysit a psycho--" "SHUTUP!" Ranma shouted, tossing a chunk of unidentified wood at her. Nabiki ducked it quickly... as Ranma recoiled. "...aww, jeez... Nabiki, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that, I just... ARGH! It's so hard to THINK straight..." Nabiki frowned. "That's it, Saotome. I'm calling Jack, and I'm cancelling this match. You're in no shape to--" "No!" Ranma protested, getting to his feet... Nabiki took a few steps back. "NO! No.. look... I'll be fine. I HAVE to face Shingo. I have to beat him! Don't you understand? I've been working towards this for MONTHS now, and, and... and I can't not do it, I have to prove myself, I... ... you're fired. Go away." "What?" "You're fired! Now you can't cancel this match for me. Only I can, and I'm going to FIGHT!" Ranma declared, grabbing the door. "So go back to moneygrubbing and leave me ALONE!" The door slammed shut hard enough to crack in half, and hang askew. Nabiki had half a mind to turn her back, march off and find someone else with championship material to manage. Someone more stable. Ignore Ranma, write him off, let him destroy himself if he was so intent on this course... Instead, something she couldn't fully understand made her stop by the telephones and snack machines, take out her Ultra Souvenir Pre-paid Sakura-chan Phone Card, and dial. THEN she would get a new prodigy. But this was the right thing to do, for now. * Hiroshi took a long pull on a portable oxygen tank. "And... we're back! And I've more or less recovered, but just to be safe, Daisuke, take it from here." He put the mask back on. "...right. Well, we've known Cloud is the new Satan for quite some time, and that he has Gourry held hostage," Daisuke recapped. "Lina has been too busy to attend to the problem, but I think you'd have to be a total yogurt head not to realize she'd have some nasty surprise ready and waiting for Cloud sooner or later. Tonight, bending the rules a bit, we're going to see Lina's old questing partner Naga the White Serpent take on Cloud Strife. No title is at stake, it's all about revenge. Although I'm not sure where the match is taking place, exactly..." A stagehand passed Daisuke a sticky note. And he turned pale. "...oh. Well, that explains a few things," he said. "Folks... tonight's Omega grudge match, now coming to you live and direct from the City of Dis, on the Shores of Hell. Good thing we use robotic cameras, is all I have to say." * Naga stood, undaunted by the lake of fire, the river of lava, and the moat of of Britney Spears clones. Hell was not impressing her. One as cultured and elegant as Naga the White Serpent had nothing to fear of such surroundings! She stood at the city gates, awaiting her opponent. Lina's instructions had been very specific, although she was more than willing to prove her innate superiority in battle against this strong foe... and she was getting paid well, too, since Heaven's budget was quite robust this fiscal year. Posing dramatically, she pointed towards the unavailable foe. "Know this, Claude Stripe!" she espoused. "I, Naga, the White Seprent, will destroy you and retrieve Gourry Gabriev, or my name is not Naga, the White Serpent, for this is what I will do!" The massive doors, composed entirely of wailing damned souls compressed into a stone aggregate, slid open with a tortured scream. Very appropriate. Wreathed in fire, the recently mentally unstable Cloud Strife stood, buster sword in hand. "This was not the deal," he said, in a flawless monotone. "I will trade Gourry for Aerith. Nothing more. She must be freed from her slavery. I will punish you for Lina's disobedience." ][ OMEGA GRUDGE MATCH ][ NAGA THE WHITE SERPENT VS. CLOUD "SATAN" STRIFE ][ FIGHT! "You are exactly one thousand years too early to defeat me, boy!" Naga declared, assuming a casting stance. "Prepare yourself!..... RAYWING!" Cloud blinked twice, as Naga went from battle-ready to whipping by him, flying through the conveniently open doors to his city. He took an unfortunately large number of seconds to turn, and run after her... but by then, she was already off. The plan was simple : Once Cloud lets you in, go get Gourry and flee. Lina's reconnaisance angels had located Gourry's holding cell by remote magic probing, and it was a simple matter of getting someone IN there physically to make the grab, and ducking out of a portal. Lina couldn't go, since God and Hell didn't mix, but Naga, on the other hand... Naga could fly in, grab him, and get out with plenty of time left for a large dinner. Laughing as she went, she turned corners like a Mig-28, knowing exactly where to go. She'd only have a few moments before Cloud caught up, but it would be enough. She blasted down the iron door to Gourry's cell with a well placed fireball, flying in, and touching down on her dominatrix- leather-boot wearing feet... Only to find Cloud had gotten here first, and stood between her and the crystal that held the motionless Gourry Gabriev. "What the--?" "I told you I would punish you," Cloud said, sword at the ready. "Lina should have known better than to play games. But I expected it of a cheating power-abusive slave driver as her... so I sent an illusion to the gates." Naga switched gears. A stand up fight was more her style, anyway. Rather than taunt, she got right down to business, and charged everything she had into one burst... "DEMONA CRYSTAL!" Waves of ice crackled into being around the room, locking Cloud's feet to the floor. He swept his blade, enriched by his own darkness, to cut himself free -- only to get further caught in the ice, which built up all around him. In seconds, the entire room was a winter wonderland, and he was a Cloudsicle. "Yosh! Now to grab Gourry and leave!" Naga decided... before realizing she'd frozen Gourry into the ice as well. Oops. Still, with Cloud taken care of, it'd just be a few carefully placed Flare Arrows until she could finish this task. She climbed past the frozen prince of darkness, and started putting very careful Flare Arrows in a circle around Gourry's crystal. Wouldn't take too long-- She felt a cold hand tap her shoulder. Cloud turned his dead eyes on her, the space where he WAS frozen now a silently steaming lake of water. The room exploded with colored light, as Cloud's patience finally broke... and he unleashed the full might of Omnislash on the White Serpent. Even with the 'less is more' theory of armor working in her favor, the end result was not pretty... several distinctly awful gashes on her body, a loss of blood on the previously white and crystalline ice, and no way of fighting back, as Cloud stood above her, sword raised... "Let this be a lesson to the so-called 'god'," Cloud said, a seething malice creeping into his usually flat voice. "She will never break my love for Aerith. No matter who I must kill to prove it to her--" He swung down, with incredible force. But not incredible enough. The sword didn't budge at all, held in place.. he turned to see what was going on. "You've already won," Son Gokuu said, staring Cloud down with his best authoritative glare. His palms gripped the blade perfectly, arm muscles rippling under the sleeves of his black and white striped referee's shirt, taking over the job of keeping it in check. "The battle's over. I can't let you continue this, Lord of HFIL." "You're just her lackey," Cloud decided, twisting around, wrenching the sword away from Gokuu's grasp. "Likely here to stop me as well. Probably also a slave... I'll destroy you, too. Xelloss told me all Lina's followers must be destroyed..." No further words were nessecary. The force of law and order in Ultra went up against Ultra's (current) greatest threat, and the fight was on. * Upstairs, Lina was pulling her hair out, figuratively. "Agh! Naga, you twit, of COURSE Ice wouldn't work!" she shouted at the scrying sphere. "And I can't even go bail her out, either. Gokuu can probably beat Cloud, but better safe than sorry... guys? I need someone to go grab Naga and Gourry while Cloud's distracted. Any takers?" She turned to the assembled forces of Heaven, her elite, her trusted advisors and helpers. Lina didn't have much truck with the whole hierarchy of angels; they were more bureaucrats than fighters, and she needed strength to deal with this Cloud twit. "I'll go," Terry Bogard said. He opted not to use a halo, harp and wings, sticking with his usual fighting clothes (or a memory of them, at least). He tightened his gloves, getting ready. "I owe you that much for letting me stop Bison from taking over the world. I've got to start earning my keep here--" "Terry, no offense, but this is a little above your level," Lina said. "Besides... you're new here, and nobody knows you're working for me yet. Let's leave it at that, in case we need you as a surprise later. Shinji, if you don't mind... you're the best for a task like this--" "I'll go," Aerith spoke, words quiet. "No," Lina said quickly. "Anyway, Shinji, now that the city gates are open down there, I can get a portal going to get you there and get back. It won't stay open long due to the interference Hell throws off. So--" "I'll go," Aerith repeated, stepping forward. "This.. this is my problem. I'm the one who did this to Cloud, even if it was a thing that needed doing... I have to be the one to help put an end to it. Lina, please. I've always done my work for Heaven without question, without asking for anything, but I have to do this." "Aerith, we don't have time for this. It's XELLOSS's fault, not yours," Lina said. "He's the one who preyed on Cloud when he was feeling weak, and now Cloud's gone bonkers. You've got nothing to do with it--" "If you don't open the portal and send someone through NOW, it may be too late," Aerith interrupted. "Lina-sama, please!" Lina groaned. "Fine, fine!" She snapped her fingers, a glowing white rectangle rising from the floor. "You've got thirty seconds before it folds. Go!" * Job responsibility was something Gokuu took very seriously. He felt he was an important figure in Ultra, someone who could keep the fights clean and civil. But that didn't mean he couldn't have fun. This Cloud guy was pretty impressive. Gokuu hadn't gone Super Saiyajin yet, not wanting the fight to be over so fast -- especially not if Lina would rescue Gourry, like he was figuring she would. But by keeping his power level even with Cloud's, it was a very challenging fight... He saw the portal slide open, and quickly took the fight down a hall, to give them time to act. Every time Cloud tried to get away, he'd knock the boy fifty yards away, and keep pressing the attack. Not much longer now... Aerith stepped out of the portal, Guard Rod in hand, and stepped over to Gourry's crystal. It was wrought from pure darkness, but being a holy figure had advantages... with an overhand strike, she shattered the soul-prison, Gourry's form falling to the icy floor below. He started to breathe again, at long last... Aerith used a Float materia and got both he and Naga airborne, sending them back through the portal and to heaven. Lina peered through the hazy fog of the portal. "Okay, we've got them!" she shouted, although it was a bare whisper through the unmeasurable distance. "C'mon, it's gonna close!" ...and Aerith stood still. She gripped her staff for support, trembling a bit in fear, but stood perfectly still. "I have to stay," she announced. "I'm sorry, Lina-sama. But Cloud will not stop hurting people close to you until I join him. I have no choice." "WHAT!?!" Lina barked. "Aerith, don't be ridiclous! Get back--" "This way, I can be close to him... and perhaps be able to save him from himself," Aerith continued. "Only then will I return. I was never your slave -- and that means I can choose my own path, and I choose this. Now, nobody else has to be hurt because of my problem. I'm sorry I had to trick you. Goodbye." And the portal slid silently shut. A shadow formed behind her. She didn't turn around; she knew who it belonged to. A cold hand slipped around her waist... only her determination to make this right, no matter how long it took, kept her from crying out in fear. "I've sent the sayajin home," Cloud spoke. "The gates of hell are closed again. We're together at last. I knew you would come back to me... my love." * Lina stared in abject shock at her scrying sphere. The portal had shut, and with the gates closed, it was impossible to open it again... in short order, her sphere fuzzled out into static as well. God's only major blindspot going completely blind. Shinji frowned, showing rare emotion. Terry was his statuesque pillar of quiet anger. Nobody was particularly happy about this. A slow fist curled through Lina's glove. "....okay, that's it," she declared quietly. "Xelloss and this Cloud punk habe gone over the line. I don't care if she DOES think that was the only way... I'm getting her back, and we're gonna stop Xelloss from monkeying around. If we've got to go to war with Satan AND The Void, well, that's what's gonna happen! GUYS! Strategy session. Someone wake up Gourry and heal Naga. We're going to need all the manpower we've got." * The Ultradome itself was quite quiet. Nobody was fully sure of what they just saw, before the cameras faded to static. Or rather, they didn't want to ADMIT to what they just saw. "All things considered," Daisuke said quietly, "I really, really miss someone as harmless as Jack as the antichrist. Folks... we'll be right back. We hope." * Not that Jack was aware of any of this. Sure, he was having a bad day and a half, his entire staff had defected to join Sony in video celebration, and so on... but he had one detail to take care of today, disasters be damned. It was a matter of pride. Controversial Jack liked to think of himself as a hands-on manager. He was there, in the pits with the boys, getting things done, making things happen, being there for his happy, valued peon employees. And being the wonderfully magnificent and generous kinda guy he was, it was time to bring in a special treat for his drones. Sure, they had all disobeyed his iron will, but maybe this way they'd feel more loyal in the long run... He waved a pair of glowing runway-direction sticks, guiding the truck. "Okay, back it up! Easy... easy... almost.... THERE!" He crossed them over his head, and the truck stopped. One metric ton of harp seal patties! The PERFECT perk to perk up fighters and make them perky little bloodletting maniacs. Of course, 50% of the wonderful treats would be shipped right to his personal kitchen, but hey, they could scrounge the rest... "Jack-saaan!" The Man Known As Jack turned, quite surprised. "The heck are you doing here? This is supposed to be a surprise." "Your secretary told me where to find you," Shingo Yabuki said, a little out of breath from running this far. Lugging around twenty pounds of gold encrusted Gamma belt hadn't helped matters. "Ah. Remind me to subtract one fish from her daily allowance," Jack said, tucking the glowsticks under an arm. "Okay, whaddya want, Yabuki?" "I don't want to defend the belt against Ranma," Shingo said. "He's in awful shape. I can't honestly say he'd be able to give me his best fight tonight, and I want to be honorable and--" "Yeah, yeah, skilled combat, venerable friends and rivals and blah blah blah," Jack rambled off, a bit annoyed. "Nobody gives a rat's ass about that sort of stuff, Shingo, this is the 00's. Look, Shingo, you have to appreciate my position here -- as head booker, I have to be concerned with Ultra's ratings. You know that one title defense you've had against Sofia? Lowest rated segment of the show. I could toss you in the ring with any other jobber and we'd get the same results. The audience knows what they want... they want to see blood, they want to see guts, they want to see YOU and RANMA, the rematch of the century! No DQ, falls count anywhere, 'I Quit' rules!" "An I Quit match?! Since when??" "About an hour ago," Jack said, proudly. "I got the idea while in the men's room. Don't ask me how, please. Anyway, don't worry, it'll be a ratings extravaganza!" "That's why you've kept me from defending this belt?" Shingo asked, getting a little angry. "Every week I'd show at the dome, only to find I wasn't being used that night... you've been saving it for this, haven't you?" "Ah! Now you're getting the idea," Jack said, grinning. "Might make a good assistant booker one day, young Shingo. Right now, we NEED a ratings savior, after the debacle last week, with the UltraDome being destroyed before the show was supposed to end. We lost two whole quarter hours of revenue! So, tonight, you and Ranma are gonna tear the house down, bleed profusely on camera, and win one for Ultra." "I won't do it," Shingo warned. "I'll leave the dome. I'll--" "You'll do it, or I strip you of that title," Jack warned. "You'll be fired so fast that you'll need an extinguisher to put out the flames. Your contract says you fight as booked, and that's the bottom line, 'cause Controversial says so." "One day," Shingo said, power-posing, "Your reign of terror will be brought to an end! Someone will challenge your evil ways and--" "Yeah, well, when that happens, your paychecks will probably take a cut, and more fighters will have to be released," Jack warned. "Because the REASON all of you have gotten raises (except for Daisuke, of course) is because our profits have gone up in recent months. My style WORKS, even better than Kasumi's in some ways. So mull that over when you go prepare, kid. The world isn't all honorable, wise and powerful do-gooders and nasty bad evil villains. Sometimes, you NEED someone like me in charge of things. Now go away, boy, you bother me." "Well... well.... ah, one second," Shingo said, consulting his Little Black FAQ Book for something dramatic to say. "Ah... ah-ha! How appropriate! You fight like a cow!" "I am rubber, you are glue," Jack quickly replied. "AAAH!" Shingo screamed, reeling in the blow from the incredible taunt. He quickly fled the scene. Kids these days, Jack thought. He yanked the lever, and let the metric ton of endangered species in little tin cans slide into the kitchen loading dock. Ah, sweet chicken of the sea... * The average attention span of an Ultra fan is exactly one commercial break. Switching gears from the Omega grudge match of the century to the Gamma grudge match of the century was as simple as five thirty second spots, and the crowd was in full throttle towards the finale. The time was now. The time was right. It was finally the main event, promised for a week, and delivered piping hot and incredibly violent... and the audience loved it. Signs supporting Ranma and Shingo popped up all over the crowd, people who were in the bathroom telepathically sensed that the show was back on and ran to their seats without bothering to pull up their pants, and generally the dome was on edge with anticipation... "Heavenly issues aside, here it is, folks! The most dangerous Gamma title defense ever!" Hiroshi hyped. "Boy, am I glad my heart has resumed its normal beat, I'd hate to miss this. A rivalry between former friends, with one gold belt hanging in the balance! Who will win? Who will be champion? Who will actually survive!?" "According to official Ultra webmonkey Lain Iwakura, the polls on our website about the match outcome are currently running 50/50, with a 50% margin of error," Daisuke said, reading off a paper. "Which solidly predicts that someone will win the match. It's amazing what they can do with statistics these days." "We've just been informed that an additional stipulation has been placed on this match," Hiroshi said. "Controversial Jack has decided that instead of knockout, the match will be decided by 'I Quit' rules. The first fighter to say the words 'I Quit' will forfeit the match. Which means it'll be even MORE brutal than we previously believed! What will happen? WHAT WILL HAPPEN?!" "Bad things, I'm guessing," Daisuke added dryly. The crowd exploded in a non-flesh-splattering-on-the-walls way, as Shingo Yabuki made his entrance... but Shingo wasn't waving to the crowd and jumping up and down as usual. Nor was he dead serious and mean looking... instead, he seemed very worried. "Shingo obviously concerned with Ranma's current state of mind, as are we all," Hiroshi explained to those not in the know. "I tell you, Daisuke, I've got a bad feeling about this match. We're going to see violence. We're going to see blood, we're going to see people getting hurt very badly..." "This is me not caring," Daisuke said, pointing to himself for emphasis. "Observe. As long as they don't splatter blood on us, I'll be happy to go home when this show is over quite safe and sound--" A loud wave of boos signaled the entrance of one Ranma Saotome. Like Shingo, Ranma was lost in his own little zone of thought... but his was more space-cadet oriented, looking pained and angry and unstable and dangerous all at the same time. A few stage hands made careful note to keep away from him as he marched his way down the ramp, and rolled into the ring, immediately taking an attack stance-- Shingo put up his hands in protest, a mike mystically appearing in one hand. "Whoa, whoa! Ranma... listen to me. Before we go and do something we'll both regret!" Ranma bounced lightly from foot to foot, not dropping his kempo attack stance. Not showing any signs of listening... but he held his ground. "I don't mind having a match with you," Shingo explained. "But not like this. What's happened to you? I've heard everything you said, how you got this way, but you can't go on like this. You look like heck! Listen, I've been reading a few self help books to try and get some idea of what you can do, and I think if you read this 'Dianetics' thing, you'll really see that your energy--" The energy cut loose, as Ranma slid forward in a blur, a solid elbow connecting with Shingo's gut. Doubled over, the boy dropped the belt and the microphone -- before receiving a Stiff-ass Kick of Doom(tm) to the jaw. The bell rang. ][ 'I QUIT' GAMMA TITLE MATCH ][ SHINGO YABUKI VS. RANMA SAOTOME ][ FIGHT! Shingo arced through the air, over the ropes, and came to a halt on the top of the announcer's table. Daisuke scrambled away from it, fast, expecting a collapse, but the table held.. for now. Hiroshi just blinked a few times, always being slow on the uptake. Ranma, however, was not slow on the uptake. He immediately ran to the corner nearest to the table, bounced from rope to rope, and stood at the very top of the turnbuckle... crouched, and ready to spring. "Hey, whoa, whoa! Innocent civilians here, Ranma! I quit! I quit!" Daisuke shouted, waving his arms -- and caught an EVIL NASTY INSANE GLARE from the young Saotome. 'Nuts to this,' Daisuke thought, diving for cover behind the Spanish Announcer's Table. In one smooth motion, Ranma sprang from the turnbuckle, flipping in the air... timed perfectly, to land back-first onto Shingo, the impact shattering the announcer's table completely. Ranma rolled off, only slightly hurt -- into Hiroshi. Not what he had planned. The three tangled up in the table wreckage, all of them quite battered from the experience. Daisuke peeked out over the top of the second table. "Good god, it's like a car wreck out here! Jack, if I get my neck broken, I swear I'll haunt you until the end of days!!" "¨Que?" asked the small dog at the spanish announcer's table, looking up from his chalupa. A few moments passed, making Daisuke wonder if in fact OTHER necks were broken. Getting up a little courage, he walked over to the pile, and prodded it with his toe, ever so gently... Ranma snapped in reaction, and snagged Daisuke's foot with his legs. One quick flip later, and Daisuke was in the air, and then through the spanish announcer's table. The table shattered on impact, of course, and Daisuke got knocked out cold, off to play with the penguins in his brain for awhile. (The small dog escaped, and was fine. Which is just further proof that if you want to survive close encounters like this, always stick by the small dog. They ALWAYS survive. It's one of those rules.) Ranma got to his feet, a glazed look in his eyes... he focused seconds later, seeing some shape that he knew was his current enemy. He grabbed Shingo by the arm, and dragged him out of the pile of wood shrapnel, fetching Hiroshi's steel folding chair at the same time. The last remaining announcer got up, slowly, groggily "...did anybody get the license number on that Gundam?" he asked, trying to sort things out... only to see Ranma, ready to beat on an unconscious Shingo with the steel chair. Clearly, the boy was moving on autopilot... but not without at least a few stray passengers wrestling with the joystick and stewardesses screaming as the plane dropped from the sky like a rock. Muscles twitched and spasmed, as he tried to hold the chair over his head, tried to swing it DOWN... "Ranma! Don't do it!" Hiroshi shouted.. but wasn't crazy enough to get closer to say it to his face. "For the love of Lina, give peace a chance!" The sound, unfortunately, just woke him out of his indecision. Then, the music went something like this : WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! Shingo woke up. It's funny what being smacked with a chair will do for your state of rest. (This is the principle behind the official Ultra alarm clock as well.) He quickly rolled onto his stomach, letting his back absorb the chairshots as he fumbled his FAQ... it was time to use the special strategy he was planning. Hopefully the costume Karin had given him for the PPV was still charged... "Shingo Power, henshin! Form of... SHAMPOO!" The costume warped and bubbled... and Ranma stepped back, his confused mind in horror. In front of him was a cute girl in chinese clothing, with bouncy purple hair... Admittedly, Shingo probably wouldn't win any beauty contests and looked more like he belonged at a showing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show, but it was enough to stun Ranma. He pulled a pair of bonbori out from CostumeSpace(tm), readying them... he didn't WANT to fight Ranma. But he had to stop him, for Ranma's own sake... "Aiya!" Shingo battle-cried, as he snagged Ranma's wrist between the handles of the bonbori, twisted around, and whipped his opponent into a turnbuckle. Ranma smacked into it face first, span around and fell flat on his back. "And Shingo with his popular Kanzuki Industries 'Gimmick-o- Matic(tm)' has turned the tide in this fight!" Hiroshi announced, getting his headset back on. "Folks, we apologize for the... technical difficulties, as my partner is out for the count, but we'll do out best to call this match for you viewers at home anyway! Shingo's advancing on Ranma... could this be the end?!" Shingo put on his best falsetto, standing over Ranma. "Ai ren say I Quit, yes? Then we go on date!" Oh, wait a minute, Shingo thought. That won't work; Ranma didn't WANT to date Shampoo. The one he liked was-- His train of thought got derailed by a foot to the chest. Ranma backflipped to his feet, smacking Shingo upside the head in the process. He reeled backwards, dropping a bonbori, fumbling through the book. What form was it, what form... what an awful time to be so forgetful of his moves! "Shingo Power, henshin!" Shingo declared, his clothing glowing as the keyword activated. "Form of... Ukyou!" "I don't think that'll work either," Hiroshi said. "Shingo once again showing his unfortunate short term memory in the ring. I don't know if that'll be enough to put Ranma off his--" "FINISH HIM, SHINGO!" Daisuke shouted, popping to his feet (with a large band-aid on his forehead). "Whack the bastard!!" "...ah.. feeling better, Daisuke?" Hiroshi asked. Shingo twirled his spatula better than a Scottish heroin addict Jedi knight twirled a lightsaber. "Okay, Ran-chan, I'm going to have to get you to stop this now. Have at you! Ho ho! Ha ha! Turn! Dodge! Trust! Parry! Spin!" Ranma grabbed the spatula handle in the middle, causing Shingo to spin instead of the spatula. Shingo flew off the handle, so to speak, over the ropes and bouncing twice to a halt in the ring. Ranma bent the spatula over one knee, and then slowly climbed up onto the apron, and between the ropes... advancing for the kill. Quickly, Shingo paged through the book. By process of elimination, this left him with only one option... "Shingo Power, henshin! Form of... Akane!" His costume blurred and shifted... leaving him in a brightly colored yellow fighting gi, a short tomboyish haircut, and a pair of realistic looking fake breasts. "I have officially seen almost everything," Daisuke said, wordless. Ranma stumbled again. Something in his mind was saying: Look who's here. Don't you have things you want to say to her? 'Akane' did her best to act the part. "Ranma! You've been a baka!" 's'he said, hands on hips. "Look at how you've been acting! Now cut it out this instant. Honestly, I can't turn my back on you for ONE SECOND without you getting into some kind of trouble..." "...Akane," Ranma said, wobbling a bit on his feet, staggering closer. "I just... I just wanted to be the best. The strongest..." It's working! Shingo thought. But contained his excitement; stay in character, stay in character... "You can't be the strongest by cheating! And you're in terrible shape. C'mon, say 'I Quit' and we'll go back to the dojo and you can rest. It's that easy." "I'm tired," Ranma said, voice somewhere between a despairing whine and a monotone. "I want to rest, I just.. I... I... I q..." Then he tripped on the Gamma belt Shingo had dropped earlier. Ranma staggered forward, arms waving to catch his balance -- and to catch 'Akane's hair, pulling the wig completely off. He skipped to a halt... face to face with exactly the wrong face. "Um, hi," Shingo said, realizing the proverbial jig was up. "Surprise?" ".................." Ranma said. And started to glow red. "DUCK!" Daisuke shouted, diving for cover and pulling some of the table remains on top of himself for safety. "He's gonna implode!" Shingo stepped back, scrabbling to retrieve his wig. But it was too late... the sickly red glow was charging all around Ranma's body. He hadn't been able to access his chi in weeks, and there was so much pent up, screwed up, unhealthy energy in his spirit wanting to get out... he put his hands forward. "HIRYUU... SHOTEN... HAGHAGHGHH--" The chi did explode, engulfing Shingo -- but it took Ranma with it. This wasn't the focused, directed energy of a martial artist but the misdirected anger of a self destructive man... when the glow and the ozone-smelling air cleared, both men were down, with Ranma taking most of the blast himself. "Good lord, they're both down AGAIN!" Hiroshi shouted. "This can't go on! Will somebody please stop the damn match?!" Almost on cue... Controversial Jack started to run down the entrance ramp. Not walk, not saunter, but flat out run. He had serious concern on his face, worry etched into his expression as if carved with a chisel... "Oh, thank Lina!" Hiroshi said, slumping back into a chair in relief. "Jack's here to put an end to this! We're saved!" "Get up, you retards!" Jack ordered Ranma and Shingo, banging on the mat with his hands. "The ratings are gonna drop if we can't get a finish to the match! GET UP! GET UP!" "...I'm not surprised," Daisuke felt he should add, from under his makeshift shelter. Both fighters got to their feet... with considerable effort. Shingo pulled himself up by the ring ropes, a stray hand grabbing the Gamma belt as he came up... Ranma tried to backflip to his feet, and failed, taking a crack to the head in the process. He had to settle for pulling himself up on a turnbuckle. "...Ranma, just say I quit!" Shingo begged. "You're totally screwed up, and you're just hurting yourself! Why won't you give up?!" "I don't GIVE UP!" Ranma shouted back, unable to get the strength to run over there an pummel his opponent. "I don't lose! Never lose twice, never... I'm strong, I'm the best, I've always BEEN the best back in Nerima, and in Ultra, I... I can't quit! I can't stop myself!" "Fine!" Shingo said, frustration snapping like a bungee cord. He took hold of the belt... and slid it across the ring, where it settled perfectly at Ranma's feet. "I QUIT!" And the bell rang. "...Shingo's given up the championship! Shingo's given up the championship!" Hiroshi duplicated. "It wasn't worth putting his best friend through hell for the belt! That's true friendship in action, folks!" "I kind of wanted to see Ranma get pounded," Daisuke grumbled, getting out from under the table wreck. "Noooooooo!!" Jack wailed, pulling at his spiky red hair. "Shingo, you putz! That's the worst finish I've ever seen to a match! You were supposed to make him submit! I can just HEAR channels changing over to monster truck shows as we speak..." Ranma slumped against the turnbuckle, dazed and confused, as he picked up the belt. The championship. The token that says you are #1, you are the best... the best martial artist ever, to make his family proud, his friends, his fiancee... He did it! He won! Months of work! He grasped the belt in both hands, climbing the turnbuckle to show it to the crowd. Cheering for himself, shaking his trophy in excitement, he realized just how far he'd gone and what he'd achieved... ...he'd lied, cheated, attacked people, insulted people, beat up his own friends, beat up girls, tossed his warrior's code to the winds and generally gotten to a point where he couldn't stand what he'd become but had too much momentum to stop it. But now it WAS over. It could finally stop. With a weak laugh, a laugh of relief, Ranma toppled forward off the turnbuckle, and fell on his head. The Gamma belt landed a few feet away. "Ranma!" Shingo called, running to the corner of the ring, and sliding out to check on his friend. "Ranma! MEDIC!" "Great. Just great," Jack said, after taking a hearty swig on the Pepto Bismol bottle. He ignored the medical techs rushing a stretcher past him, walking over to sulk with his underpaid announcers. "We get some cheesy finish to the most promoted main event of the season, and now our new champion has a nervous breakdown. No, I should have seen it coming. But NOOOOooo, I had to go for the quick fix to Ultra's problems..." "I'd say 'I told you so,'" Daisuke said, "But I forgot to tell you so in the first place. But I would have." Shingo walked over to the group, carrying the Gamma belt. "Ranma's not going to be able to defend this," he said, solemnly (or as solemn as the wacky goofy kinda guy he was could manage). "The techs say he's got malnutrition, severe exhaustion, and all kinds of bad stuff. But I lost the belt, Jack. I won't let you just put it back on me without earning it." He passed the belt to the head booker of Ultra. Jack held it up, not sure what to make of it. "Okay, well... we'll... uh... dammit. My mad wind ninja booking skeelz are failing me! What'll we do with the belt?..." And then he noticed his WWVMD bracelet. "That's it!" Jack shouted. "What Would Vince McMahon Do?" A superdeformed Vince McMahon popped up on his shoulder. "Screw Shingo out of the title in Montreal!" it suggested. "He's not from Canada," Jack corrected. "Oh," Chibi-Vince ohed. "Then do this..." And there was much whispering, before the tiny figure poof!ed away. Daisuke rubbed his eyes a few times. Maybe it's time to switch to decaf, he thought. Jack's smile jacked up six degrees. He slung the belt over a shoulder, and climbed up into the ring... mike in hand. Millions waited on edge for the announcement... he could tell, they WERE buying the drama. The 'cheap finish' had them all on the edge of their seats, they actually LIKED this cheeseball honorable-warrior-friend soap opera nonsense... if so, they'd LOVE this. "Okay! The following is an official decision by Your Personal Sports Entertainment God, myself!" Jack declared. "Due to illness, Ranma Saotome will not be defending the belt. Therefore, I declare the title vacant!" He tossed the belt onto the mat, letting it lie. For now. "AND," he added, "To determine a WORTHY Gamma Champion, to make the belt meaningful, we are going to hold... a tournament. Four participants, to be declared one per episode until the next pay per view spectacular, UltraRage Delta... each will have to prove worthy of entering the tournament, in addition to winning two single elimination matches to take the gold, as the undisputed champion! Shingo! I want you to be in slot #1. You said you want to earn the belt? Here's your chance. I think you deserve it after the mess we've had today. Do you accept?" "Yes!" Shingo declared. "I accept! In Ranma-sensei's name, I will defeat all opponents in my way!" (Daisuke quickly got out of Shingo's way, just in case.) "Sounds groovy here!" Jack declared. "So, sports-entertainment fans, you're gonna get four weeks of hot fighting action that'll leave you glued to your television sets, buying our merchandise, and soon I WILL be able to afford that seventh Lotus Turbo Esprit! Let's win one for the Jackster, and on with the Ranma Saotome Memorial Gamma Tournament!!" "Great Lina! We've got an astounding development!" Hiroshi announced. "A tournament for the gold! A champion in the hospital! What will happen next! WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT?!" "Nothing, the show's over," Daisuke said. "G'night, everybody." "I KNOW, Daisuke, work with--" "I told you never to say that again. Until next week, this is Daisuke and Hiroshi. Now shut off your TV and get some sleep. You've got work tomorrow, you know." * Nabiki walked along the halls of the UltraDome later that night, her expensive shoes clicking on the sterilized tile. She glanced occasionally at her companion, nervous glances. "You knew this would happen," Nabiki asked. "There's some reason for it, right? I know you don't know why, anymore, but there was a reason in the first place, right?" "Hai... an important one. The outcome was unavoidable. But it's over now, and he needs to go home," Kasumi said, opening the doors to the medical ward. "Thank you for calling me, Nabiki. Doctor Tofuu and I can help him now. He'll recover." Nabiki leaned against the doorway. "Uh-huh. How long do you think THAT'LL take?" "...I don't know," Kasumi said. "But we'll find a way." -=- ][ ULTRA EPISODE 37 RESULTS/RECAP: ][ DAN defeats VOIDUCK, now at 6W/12L ][ CLOUD and NAGA battled to a No Contest ][ RANMA defeats SHINGO for the Gamma Belt, now at 10W/7L ][ Gamma Belt declared Vacant, champion to be determined at UltraRage Delta Ed. Note : Sorry for the makeshift episode. The main event and related side scenes were already written; the rest we had to whip up hours before posting due to the previous author skipping. Dan vs. Voiduck was written by W4, and MANY thanks to him for that! The Aerith development is a bit out of the blue, but given the arguments and confusion about how to USE the Cloud/Lina plot given their situations, I figured a new twist might help. If I went too far, I apologize, I was really rushed for time and thought I'd try to help a stagnant plot rather than allow it to go by another month without use.